Of Drawing & last night

last night is actually today morning, and kissing her and all the buildings, mountains which lay ahead. And meeting her after 5 years or 3 years or 9 years and sitting and realising kissing happened. Everything was at peace. no conflict.

but things are complicated as this is a psychological dream with an intention of framing a web of thoughts to make me feel in a certain way. In the dream i do not experience the kiss, but it turns dark, that two beings become one. they are cosy as they sit together. sitting together with extreme comfortless.

This makes me say in the dream. ‘ i never noticed that there were such high mountains in delhi. But in reality, delhi is flat. it does not have a mountain horizon. It’s plain in sight everywhere you see. I saw mountains just pile up. I am sitting with her and this mountains like pieces of torn paper keep piling up. And i can hardly see the sky. It is dark. It is dark black, grey, blue. Everything. Including me and her.

Psychologically, She is someone i am not in touch with for 7-8 years but in this dream we meet. There are no issues in the dream.

It is mixed just like mixed fruit juice. A friend of mine in this dream has taken money from me and i call that you need to pay me my money back. So a deal is struck that by dec 25th, 75, 000 rs will be paid and the remaining in Jan. Rs 15,000/- This deal is struck when i am pursuing and forcing to return my money. This in the same dream goes on with few of the people. They are not returning the money.

In reality people have taken money and are not returning. But in the dream it is an artist friend. And we are talking on the phone and a deal is struck. I want my money. I need my money.

But Last night i could not sleep till 2 am. I was here:

When conversations don’t end when you meet someone. That you did not exhaust them completely. Complete exhaustion can only come when you dont depart till everything is vomited out. But that is not possible. so i struggled from 12 am to 2 am. Do i write something on twitter, on facebook, a private message on whats app or instagram. Where do i say that final line before final departation of the mind which puts me sleep. Sleep is something i was begging, seeking but i could not get myself to sleep.

So there is struggle in the awakened physical world as well as the slept world. And then there is the dream world.

So a kiss in the dream world, money coming back to me and delhi with a horizon line which has rows and rows of mountains. Is there a pattern to how i dream ?

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